As the warm weather arrives, the British male emerges from his cocoon of slim leg jeans and joggers, stepping out with legs so pale they could blind those looking directly at them and prepares to brave the sunshine in shorts.
This embracing of the summer months happens early in the year, because who knows how long the sun will stick around this island. And so, for those gentlemen looking for advice on how to get the most of their summer short selection, here’s a guide on how to wear them for every occasion during the season ahead:
Cargo shorts – for the lads’ holiday
5am beers at the airport and the purchase of overpriced designer sunglasses should always be accompanied by cargo shorts, featuring many pockets so as to keep the hand luggage weight down. Those wearing cargo shorts should be also prepared to tap every pocket possible in a panic during their stint at the airport, as they feel for their phone/passport/wallet. Cargo shorts are however comfortable, classy and can double up as evening shorts for the inevitable nights out that will take place while away with the lads.
Chino shorts – for the summer wedding
A wedding in August usually equates to sweating in a shirt and removing the tie by midday for fear of overheating. To balance this out, chino shorts could save the day and can be introduced once the serious ceremony is over and the photos are finished – no bride wants to see numerous men’s knees populating her wedding photos. A pair of men’s shorts that complement the suit and tie being worn are a good option, although you can never go wrong with a tan or stone coloured pair.
Denim shorts – for the music festival
Denim is a good choice for a music festival, although it isn’t quick drying if you end up in an inevitable downpour so a longer length raincoat is probably a good option. However, knee length denim shorts are great for balmy summer evenings with a cider in hand, while you peer over thousands of heads to get a glimpse of your hero on the stage. Insect repellent is recommended when wearing these shorts, legs that haven’t seen the sun in a while are like a neon sign for every hungry bug for miles.
Jogger shorts – for the summer BBQ
A last minute summer BBQ is a sure sign of warmer weather and therefore the need for shorts – and comfy jogger shorts are the best option for such an event. They’re ideal for kicking back, with your feet in a paddling pool, while you watch your mate cook directly on the flame and burn all the meat. Bon appetite!
Whatever shorts you need for your summer events, avoid turning into a lobster from the knees down with plenty of sun cream and also enjoy the t-shirt tan you’ll inevitably end up with by the time autumn rolls round.