“Do you want to be different?” This is the first question I ask people who attend my workshops or who come to me for life coaching or energy- management consultation. Everyone says yes. Everyone. Always. No exceptions. This led me to the simple conclusion that no one is satisfied being as they are now.
If you read this and shake your head in disagreement, then I congratulate you. If you are content with yourself as you are now, you are a whole being, and I celebrate that with all my heart. However, very few people want to be as they are. Deep down, John wants to be like Frank, but he doesn’t know that deep down inside, Frank wants to be like John. John goes around to Frank’s place and sees everything through the eyes of scarcity or absence. He sees what he does not possess; he sees what he is not. It is as if he is blind, seeing neither what he holds nor what he is. In his mind, deliberately and systematically, he rejects the way he is, tears himself to pieces, and dreams of being different.
I have met people who have suffered their whole lives because they felt they were too short. They should arrange a meeting with those people who have suffered from believing they are too tall. How have we created this reality? Why are so few women happy with their appearance, especially the parts that attract the most attention in today’s society? Why do we always want breasts that are a little firmer or a penis that is a little larger? Why are so many backsides too big (unless, of course, they are too small)? Why do so many people have a traumatic relationship with their genitals, their abs, their biceps, or their breasts?
In a world where nobody feels adequate, we tell ourselves there is always something missing, and we continue onward, forever searching for what we think we lack. And we find nothing except new and greater deficiencies and new dreams with which to taunt ourselves.
Featured image by Clare Black